dear god, do i deserve guys who cheat,lie n "touch" gals in a way they are not suppose to?? i mean i dun really lie, im faithful, im truthful as well, i aint a control bitch, i look good (i reckon lots of guys are eyein on me since i look good in any angles ;p) i mean overall im a furkin good gf. so tell me now, are u bein fair? to send such a guy n make me fall in love wit him? but right now i think i do deserve so much better!! my heart breaks too many times n i cant mend it bac no more. feelings are strange things. endless lies,loads of excuses,foc-i love u,never wanna lose me(cos i noe im a good catch!) wad else? i had enough. period. called me dumb for bein DUMB lik duh. i think i woke up. no more dreamin tat he changed o abt settling dn. the only hardest thing to let go, her.
i've decided to go to las vegas wit my mom n her fren(plus her family!) end of this yr if i hav enough annual leaves. brissy,soon alright? im gonna travel n enjoy when i can. i love myself. now tats called true love.
date noted: 18/05/07 a day i wish to kill myself once again. a day i wish that i've neve met him at all. a day i wish to jus grab wad i hav and fly bac to brissy,dun even mind earnin easy money to get by. i jus wish to b away fro everyone. im so ashamed to face my parents. must hav hurt them real bad if they have known that their precious daughter has been mentally n physically abused by someone she loves.
well,im leavin everythin behind now. i aint myself no more. i jus wanna b alone.
dull day. cramps,cramps n more cramps. always happen on the first day. additional: migraines, was a terrible terrible day huh. some more i had to go bac home by cabbie today. n the taxi uncle is a crazy furk,he horned more than 7 times o more thru out the whole journey,crazy hey!
yester was my darling 24th. took some prints. was fun but maeko got scared(cos of her old aunty n our 2 frens!lol) laughed non stop,i reckon she thout tat we were crazy.haha. glad tat his sis n frens came along to make the day more special. im missin him so much now (=
spent nearly 3 days(to b exact,2nhalf days!) with my babies. really feel lik home when i stayed over. i felt so weird n lost yester when i noe tat i hav to go bac hm, n tat maeko has to go bac to her aunt(today) n both of us hav to go bac to work.. the feelin was lik the happiness are so short lived,everythin was jus a dream. but my baby has never fail to assure me. really appreciate him for his patience n love. thanks hun.
